Thursday 30 August 2012

Accommodation Theory

Accommodation theory states that when people talk to each other, they adjust their behavior and manner of speech to take account of, "to accommodate", the topic, the circumstances, and the other people engaged with them in the conversation. For example: people talk more slowly to foreigners and use baby talk when interacting with infants. The way people communicate with each other is central to the kind of social interaction at issue.

Thus, friends and lovers, and especially people in the process of becoming friends and lovers, make every effort to converge in manner, accent, tone and topic. Someone wishing to keep his distance or disagree will always adopt a manner of speaking, expressing differently from that of the other party.

These ideas matter because it is clear that difficulties experienced by immigrants and foreigners everwhere arise in part from the difference of their speech mannerisms, and the limits tot their ability to 'converge' with native speakers when trying to communicate. As world globalizes further at an increasingly rapid pace, and as a major migrations of people especially from the southern to the northern hemisphere continue, so the problems and too often frictions increase: accommodation theory, for all its surface simplicity, gives insights into how miscommunication  and misinterpretation happen and how matters can be improved.

Accommodation theory was devised in the early 1970's by Howard Giles, whose first insights into communication came while working in a medical clinic in Wales. He wrote "the patients I took to the physicians just had to open their mouths and speak and I could predict the manner in which the physicians were going to deal with them." The ideas he developed have been applied by advertisers and party political researchers in thinking about the effective ways of getting the message across the target audience, and by business management training, advising clients on how to behave in foreign countries.

The limits of accommodation theory are illustrated by the latter. Studies found that efforts used by western businessmen who over accommodated in order to please or partners among Japanese businessmen were in fact counterproductive. The danger is that behaviour which appears to involve mimicry of others can look like mockery; in the Japanese case the businessmen from Japan preferred the foreigners to foreigners.

Accommodation theory is of particular value among other things, thinking about ways of integrating immigrant communities into host communities, where integration is a term between assimilation and multiculturalism, just means providing a way for immigrants who to get along with the host communities to succeed economically. With mass immigration has come the realization that it is ineffective to expect immigrants to do all accommodation, and that has resulted in host community adjustments to take account of linguistic and cultural factors.

The Winds


    "when the winds of change are blowing, you need to know which way and how fast"


This is an article from a magazine. Our life is full of ups and downs. We don't know what has happened and what is happening the next. We are not aware of it. There will be goods and bad in life. The winds may be strong as storm ,or light as breeze. How ever the wind blows they are gods plans. Just know them and go that way. Don't strike for it or grumble for it. If god has given any situations to face, He will give you the grace also. Just face it bravely . Walk the way along.

Wednesday 29 August 2012

ALTRUISM

In primary sense, putting interest of others before one's own is known as altruism. The term 'altruism' was coined by Auguste Comte in 1851 from the Italian word 'altrui' which means 'others'. It literally means 'otherism'. The concept of altruism appears in most moral systems. The key aspect to altruism lies in "thinking about the good and nature of relationships and states that the question of what is owed to others, both in connection with particular obligations and generally, should occupy a central place."

A true altruist is a one who believes in selflessness and carries out his obligations to others without any consideration of his own self-interest. for example, when we cross a busy road and help someone cross along with us, that is not altruism. But when we help someone cross the road without considering whether we need to or not, that is altruism.

The founder of the concept of altruism believed that "individuals had a moral obligation to renounce self-interest and live for others." Comte says in his Catechisme Positiviste that, "social points of view cannot tolerate the notion of rights, for such notion rests on individualism. We are born under a load of obligation of every kind, to our predecessors, to our successors, to our contemporaries. After our birth these obligations increase or accumulate, for it is sometimes before we can return this service...This ['to live for others'], the definitive formula of human morality, gives us a direct sanction exclusively to our instincts of benevolence, the common source of happiness and duty. [Man must serve] Humanity whose we are entirely."

Altruism is an extreme concept.There is nothing called "true altruism" in practice. But whenever the term altruism is said, the name that comes immediately to my mind is Mother Teresa. She was as altruist as any individual could be. She gave up her life for the needy and poor. She says that, "By blood I am an Albanian. By citizenship an Indian. By faith I am a catholic. As to my calling, I belong to the world. As to my heart, I belong entirely to the heart of Jesus."

Mother Teresa is one in a million, and in reality, every deed which is enacted by an individual has a motive. The motive may not be money or power but it will then be pleasure or satisfaction. The practical aspect of altruism has often been criticized and, "critics have been quick to say that neither kin selection or reciprocal selection is 'true altruism' because of course  there is an advantage to the actors themselves in both kinds of case...Among conscious and and reflective human beings it might be expected that principles, beliefs, affections and interests and a sense of greater good might trump self-interests and even self-preservation at times-and that they often do." Hence, altruism may exist literally but it cannot exist in reality.

Untitled


                           “It’s a funny thing about mothers and fathers,
                           Even when their own child is the most disgusting
                           Little blisters you could ever imagine, they still
                           Think that he or she is wonderful.”
                                             -Roald Dahl, Matilda

                                              Parents play very different positions in different phase of life. For an infant, his parents is his priority, for an adolescent parents become a teacher (that’s the most decent term I could come up with) for an adult like mine, fresh out of home, parent become a crucial part of the support system as realization of their importance dawns upon us. For a well settled adult, parents become a responsibility, often with time a burden.
                                            It’s easy to forget eighteen years of your life spent under the intense care and protection of your parents because when you remember those days all you remember are memories of school, cousins and parties. All those sacrifices your parents did for you, all those curses they heard for your mistakes even the loan they had to take to get you educated are so easy to forget. What you can’t forget is the privacy they hindered, the curfew time they imposed in your house, the times they fell sick and you had extra work to do.
                                 “Perhaps family itself, like beauty, is temporary,
                                  And so discredit need attach to impermanence.”
                                                          -Gregory Maguire (A lion among men)
                                       Parents of this era especially well educated parents move away as soon as their child settle down and become independent. Couples move back to their native place or live apart. Do they really want to do that? Do they not want to live with their children and grandchildren and enjoy the energy? It’s the fright of spoiling relationships, hurting their children that make them go away. Especially a single parent having already lost the comfort of the partner would always look forward to the joy of being with the loved ones alive. In these situations they move into a old age centres. True it is that they get all care and comfort but man doesn’t always need luxury but man always craves love and warmth. Will the comfort of the old age home keep your parents happy? Don’t they deserve to spend the last of their lives with the people they love?
                                     Maybe we could find a solution from both the ends of the problem. Parents are what you deserve and what you deserve are your parents, till the very end.

Untitled



Away from home, life is restless. I find peace in these parks of Bangalore. I was sitting in the park one evening after a hectic day in college when something grabbed my attention. Famous as it is, the cool winds swayed and played with the boughs of the tree I was sitting under.
                                  The leaves looked blissful, ecstatic, dancing in merriment. It reminded me of the victory dance done in many tribes of India. The leaves enjoying the wind as much as I was. Suddenly a leaf fell off and kissed the ground. It lay lifeless on the ground. Soon it would be coffined by the mud, forgotten.
                                Life is too short. When we sit and wonder how we will survive another fifty years, we forget that we already have enjoyed twenty years of life. Many external sources come by as agents of happiness but we are so sure that happiness will come walking and slap itself on our faces that we give no heed to ones that brush past.
                             When one sits idly in Bangalore, these winds will give you happiness and peace. When one sits wondering what to do these trees and parks distract you. Bangalore has so much beauty to be absorbed but each of us are so busy feeling lonely, home sick, out of place or trying so hard to get into the “culture” that we tend to avoid everything else around.

                            “Our environment, the world in which we live and work,
                                      is a mirror of our attitude and experiences.”

Tuesday 28 August 2012

Grace Irrespective

I open my eyes to the brand new day.
it's a wonder I'm awake.
Nothing is to be sure of, nothing's unchanged.
Except for Grace.

Plans for the morrow, I had made.
Already pondered over hopes and fears.
The clock keeps ticking, never still.
I move through the day because of Grace.

It is grace, that gives me strength to remember,
And grace that lets me forget.
When life becomes mighty tangled
It is grace that mends my heart torn.

Perfect days and perfect people
Are a concept born of perspective
But to belong to a perfect GOD;
That is Grace, irrespective.

The Art of the Imperfect

Artist Phil Hansen gave a TED talk on how he "embraced the shake", his limitation and harnessed potential in his creativity. He throws a thought at us that perhaps instead of telling each other to 'seize the day', perhaps we should say 'seize the limitation'. He's right. What if, everytime we hit a brick wall in things we're up against, we decipher ways to embrace the limitations that we have? What if, when I faced writer's block, I used words to make a painting in a somewhat 'free association' sense; would it help to let out what I'm trying to say?
     But really, how feasible is this idea? There are many children who grow up forced to study things that they do not have a capacity for or do not want to embrace the capacity. How would they embrace their limitations? How would they step back from their miniscule look to see the big picture and change it?
     Somehow, I feel compelled to say that this could only apply in the world of art and creativity where you have the freedom to test the waters and 'step out of the box'.
     But, if one actually thinks about it, one realises that this world runs on those limitations being pushed. Every scientific experiment, every technological development, it's all someone somewhere who pushed the limits or used the limits differently. So, the real question possibly is,
                                  "How do we learn to embrace our limitations?"


The First Words As A Christite...

Sharp at 9 I came inside,
And all my counterparts approaching like a tide.
Smiles and doubts on every face,
For the beginning of an all new phase.
Finding friends was the biggest task
As everyone seemed to be wearing a mask!
Fear of teacher, fear of class,
There I was amidst a huge mass!
Teacher came and called my name,
Thought struck me of getting fame…..
Projects, notes, presentations and assignment
All put an end to students’ excitement.
“March on Christites…” reminded us,
Not to stop at the very first.
Thus we all began to cope,
Our journey as Christites with hope!!!.....

Monday 27 August 2012

Journey




The long horn of the train wake her up from a small nap.Journeys are a part of life of most of us.Our life itself is a journey.A journey through an unknown path.Such journeys to kanyakumari is not unusual to Anurada.Such an ‘escapism’ as she loved to call it,was usual as the situation gets more worse.

Weekends are always rush days and that saturday was not different either.She get into S5 compartment and seated at window seat number twenty seven.As the train left the railway station she read the yellow board with black letters which spelled ‘THRISSUR’,the city which gifted her tears.Tears of a broken marriage life.It may be because of that she found it difficult to get adjusted to the four wall apartment at poonkunam.This urban life settled a lot of cobwebs around her.She was swept away by the invisible tide of time.She can’t bear it no more.She need a relief.A relief from the belief that surya baghavan is waiting for her to show its red cheeks before visiting the great depths of the sea. She was reading as the train passed through major cities and unknown villages with its head high and a long storm like horn.She was reading about ravi and appukili in the novel ‘Gasakinte Ethihasam’.Ravi stirred her heart.Both are unlucky in the case of being loved.Anurada’s was a love marriage.The marriage which later became a broken mirror.Nowadays her heart thrombs to see kanyakumari devi.May be because devi also have a history of broken love with lord shiva.She always felt that its better not to get married like
kanyakumari devi than bearing a marriage life which within four years had a development to push apart her and her husband first to two corners of a bed and now to two bedroom in an apartment.

The train arraived a few hours before the sunset at kanyakumari.After having a hot cup of tea and a fresh bath from a nearby hotel,she went to the kanyakumari beach.The beach known for the great thiruvallur statue.........the beach known for the virgin kanyakumari............the beach
famous for the Vivekananda rock and the beach which witness the triveni sangamam.The way to the beach is filled with small shops selling varieties of shells,chain,bangles,mirror decorated with shells and various other things.She saw herself in one of the mirror wearing red and white bandhini salwar kameez with her long hair free and a red round bindi on her forehead.Kajal made her eye twinkle like the polar star.

As anurada walked towards the sea her mind felt the indefinite ecstacy.She sat on the sandyland watching the sunset.The sky seemed to be bathed in red kashmiri sindooram.The sun with a promise to see this beach tomorrow went beyond the sea.Drowning the sea into darkness,the sun went to wake up another land.......another culture.......another dawn.Birds flied in flocks across the sea in search of their nests.Being not disturbed of the arrival and departure of the sun,waves came and left the sandyland.Each wave bore a pain in its heart while leaving the sandyland.

One and half an hour at KFC


LOCATION – KFC in forum mall
TIME - 5:30 PM

SCENE 1 - A girl in her sweet seventeen is laughing like anything.She has a young boy (most probably her boyfriend) beside her and a bowl of fig ice-cream on the table.May be,this may be the moment she awaited for. Although most lovers used to meet everyday, small gaps between daily meetings give them a feel that they are waiting for hours to see each other.They like to count time
not in terms of minutes. Instead they like the ‘second system’. 600 seconds is always larger than 10 minutes in terms of number,in terms of romance.

SCENE 2 - Girl moved her hair gently behind her ears as it happened to jump

to her forehead and disturbed her eyelids.The boy,tall, handsome with shaved
moustache and frameless spectacles was just smiling at her.Its always like
that.Most boys have control over laughing(at least in public)but girls don’t.Girls
laugh as they lost their nuts(not all but a few).The laughing beauty adorned
in red salwar kameez with her free hair and a long ear ring and a simple chain
around her neck is shining like an angel in the boy’s eye.

SCENE 3 - The boy with his one hand around her neck took a small spoon of

icecream with his other hand and gave it to her.Its better to say that he feeded
her.As it was around 6:30pm,there was a good rush in KFC.The behaviour of
these two seems to feel that they are the only people there.

SCENE 4 - The boy started speaking about many incidents in his life.He gave

himself a heroic figure in all these incidents.The girl heard all these with great
patience looking in to his eyes without a blink.Her eyes says how much she is
proud in this moment to get such a hero as her boyfriend.Most girls likes to
believe that their boyfriend is the best in this world(in most cases its only a
blind belief).

SCENE 5 - Both are looking eye to eye.No job for their tounge.Now heart

speak eyes transmit it in the form of ‘something’.This ‘something’ is not

yet discovered by scientists.For the time being call it some sort of waves.

SCENE 6 - One hour and twenty minutes passed away.For the next 10

minutes they started preparing to leave.Their preparation include fixing the
day for next dating.They left leaving behind the red plastic tray with the sticker
of KFC,a transparent glass bowl with a little bit of watery icecream and a used
tissue paper.

SCENE - A group of boys occupied the same table.Darkness blanketed the

banglore city.More people came and left KFC.As usual banglore continued its
busy hangouts.

Two sides of a seesaw


After work at the library , I sat with a group of friends at the benches near the football field. Being 7:30 pm , it was dark enough to hide the silhouettes of the trees on the other side. But the glow created by the nearby lamp posts , made me feel calm all of a sudden. The cool breeze left me speechless and dazed until i realized my watch showed eight pm. 
                     Though christ university is in the midst of one of the most bustling and happening cities . I feel utterly distant and isolated from it all. Not that I'd complain. When i walk around the campus whether the sun is shining over or the moonlight , to me Christ university means a place that teaches us professionalism and competition in this fast-paced life. Ironically, when i sit at the football field benches, I forget it all. I don't want to get up, I want to pause a minute to forget the busy hectic life this college is helping me trying to adapt to.   

Intelligent but unwise


The human race constantly boasts about it's abilities. Being recognized as the strongest race , is not the same as being the brightest. It was once said,' the sharpest race is the one that can adapt to the changing environment the best', We fail to realize that day by day our earth is ruining itself because of our actions. The inconvenient truth of a shriveled up toxic planet doesn't seem to make us cringe. Instead of facing the worse to come, we're ready to pull out the last few bottles of beer and celebrate the remaining days we have to live. Gotye in his composition of 'eyes wide open' mentions so ;
                                     'So this is the end of the story ? '
                                     everything we had , everything we did,
                                     is buried in dust , and the dust is all that's left of us'
Expressing contempt towards the human race , Gotye asks ' So is this the end of the story ?'. 
                    The thought of a full fledged annihilation doesn't seem to stir a single emotion in us. I suppose man will never understand the value of our earth until it is nothing more than dust and earthy crumbs. Looking at how ignorance is keeping us bliss , we are surely to be remembered as nothing more than dust. 
                                                     ' But only a few are worried ,
                                                      While the signs were clear , they had no idea,
                                                      You just get used to living in fear , 
                                                      or give up , 
                                                      when you can't even picture your future. '
The environmentalists , climatologists and workers bring shocking news to our homes everyday. The rate of natural disasters has gone up rapidly. The immediate aftermath of the disaster often drop our jaws when we hear of the nature's wrath. Gotye admits that we succumb easily. Without putting up a fight , we simply lay back and wait for defeat to cliam us. How shameful can we be? Whether it is laziness or fear , we are utterly demotivated. We seemed to have accepted it as an inevitable end. 
         Gotye couldn't have said it better,' we walk the plank with our eyes wide open'.